The
question arises: "Will I get married and to whom?" The
pressures around us from our peers, parents and the world in general are often
very strong. Young people are expected to have a boy friend or girl friend
from a very early age and if they do not they are seen to be failing. A
relationship with a girl or boy may also be used as an expression of ego and
superiority in young people who want to be seen with a partner. However
it may just be the done thing, "everybody else does it, so I'll do it
too." We have to realise, too, that young people have natural
desires to be with members of the opposite sex of their own age. The fear of
being “left on the shelf,” apparently unwanted, with the real stigma that this
may bring can also lead some to be desperate to marry someone.
How
does the young person steer himself or herself through this minefield? - Let's
answer a few questions.
Firstly
the Christian is a person who has committed his life to the Lord Jesus Christ
and come under His lordship and direction. If in our hearts we have truly
yielded to Him then our own desires or indeed the plans of those around us are
of no account. Only His will shall be my aim and only His will is BEST.
Does God want the best for me?
If
I trust the matter of my marriage to God will I have to make do with somebody
that no one else wants? Will I ever get married? Will I perhaps
miss out on a lot of fun? Let us think about our God! "All
things work together for good to them that love God" Romans 8 v 28.
"Let
the Lord be magnified, which hath pleasure in the prosperity of His
servant." Psalm 35 v 27.
"Delight
thyself in the Lord; and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart.
Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in Him; and He shall bring it to
pass." Psalm 37 v 4 and 5.
The
more we get to know and trust our Father, we experience that He gives only good
gifts to His children. He knows whether or not we are best to be married,
and He knows how we will be able to serve Him best. So if we are to
remain single we know that His will is best - indeed in 1 Corinthians chapter 7
Paul says that to remain single is better. If He wants us to be married
He will have prepared a partner for us before we were born and He knows best how
to bring us together.
If we do it God's way will it be boring?
God
created all the good things we associate with courtship: love, joy, happiness
and the physical and mental attraction of the opposite sex. Only as led
in the will of God will these things be enjoyed to the full if we leave the
choice of our partner to God: His choice and in His time.
Young people with all the pressures you face are you
prepared to go this way?
As
a young man I had many lessons to learn. I thought I knew all the answers
but at the age of seventeen I came to realise that I needed to completely
rethink my attitude to this subject. I came to the conclusion that God
knew what was best for my life and if He wanted me to be married He would guide
me to the right person when His time was right. I did not want to do
anything that would prevent my receiving His best. I realised that God
knew how to give me a wife, if that was His will, so I determined that I would
not in any way commit myself to anyone until I was sure it was the Lord's
will. (I was sure that in such an important matter I would not be in any
doubt.) I made a simple rule for myself that I would not go out alone
with or show attachment to any girl until I was sure of God's will. This
way I avoided being carried along by a momentary whim.
I
am sure that it will be different for each one of us, but God rewarded me
beyond my wildest dreams with a lovely wife, a romantic coming together and a
oneness of feeling and purpose for which we constantly thank Him. We
often spend hours reminiscing over the way we came to know each other and it
gives much pleasure to see the way the Lord works. In giving these
personal details I would be the first to admit much failure on my part but of
this I am sure; having committed my way to the Lord He did not fail me.
As
we have seen, the ideal of Scripture is that there should be one man joined to
one woman, and I would love to be able to say to my wife that I have never
shown affection to another, but through self will and lack of understanding
that is not so.
God
knew that I needed a wife and that we could serve the Lord better together than
apart and His will is best. Pray to God to show you His way, don't decide
what you want and then pray about it. Pray that He may make His mind clear to
you and then you will be able to thank Him when He gives the answer.
Title : "IN SEARCH OF GOD'S BEST"
Description : The question arises: "Will I get married and to whom?" The pressures around us from our peers, parents and the world in genera...